Locked inside a heaven gone to hell
All the dreams were gone but not forgotten
- Kris Kristofferson
All the dreams were gone but not forgotten
- Kris Kristofferson
I started a journal about 30 years ago, in which I wrote down all the things I was going to do in my lifetime. A lot of the entries were places I was going to travel to. Others were things I wanted to accomplish. One entry per page so I could write down the date I did it and any description or diary-like entry of what I did.
Some of them were a sign of the times, things I was involved in at the time I wrote them - like bicycling and rock climbing, with entries like "Cycle through the British Isles" or "Climb in the Tetons". And I listed traveling to all seven continents and fifty states. I haven't cycled or climbed anywhere outside the U.S. but I am close to getting to all fifty states and have made it to Canada, Mexico, Germany, Austria, Scotland, and twice to Ireland.
Some things listed were the routine things you'd expect: graduate from college, get married, have kids. I graduated with a degree in education, then went back twenty years later and got my Masters and my principal's license. Then went back five years after that to get my superintendent's license. I got married and next year will celebrate 30 years along with three beautiful daughters.
Some accomplishments, I'm really proud of. I wanted to learn chemistry just because. I never took it in high school and certainly didn't need it to become an elementary school teacher. But I wanted to understand it. So I took it in college - and got an A. I learned how to fly a plane when Greg belonged to a flying club. I've learned karate and how to ride horses.
Some dreams though, fall by the wayside for one reason or another. I always wanted to learn to play the piano, but never did in all the years we had my sister's piano here at our house. It's one of the few regrets I have but I was busy with grad school and simply put my time elsewhere. I always wanted to take swim lessons and learn how to swim well; conquer my fear of deep water. With two chest/shoulder surgeries, that just won't happen. Neither will learning to play the bagpipes. And I will probably hang up my dream of learning how to parachute. Saying I wanted to parachute is how I met my husband. He heard me say that the night a group of us went out to a bar and he decided he wanted to get to know me better. But when you've had surgeries as extensive as these, you know better than to put yourself in a position where you could ever be in that much pain again. And parachuting, like motorcycles, carries too much risk for my comfort. It's sad when you let your dreams go, whatever the reason. You realize you're mortal...that you're growing older...that you've got limited funds...or time...or.....
There is one entry in that journal, entered Feb 1982 - 30 years ago - that says "publish some of my writing". Through my involvement with La Leche League, I became an editor for their Leader magazine Leaven which is read by their leader volunteers all over the world. On occasion, I wrote articles for them that were published in that journal. So I can say I've accomplished that goal. But I am revising it. I want to devote enough time to my writing that I can submit a manuscript to a publisher and have a book published. That's my dream now.
Some of them were a sign of the times, things I was involved in at the time I wrote them - like bicycling and rock climbing, with entries like "Cycle through the British Isles" or "Climb in the Tetons". And I listed traveling to all seven continents and fifty states. I haven't cycled or climbed anywhere outside the U.S. but I am close to getting to all fifty states and have made it to Canada, Mexico, Germany, Austria, Scotland, and twice to Ireland.
Some things listed were the routine things you'd expect: graduate from college, get married, have kids. I graduated with a degree in education, then went back twenty years later and got my Masters and my principal's license. Then went back five years after that to get my superintendent's license. I got married and next year will celebrate 30 years along with three beautiful daughters.
Some accomplishments, I'm really proud of. I wanted to learn chemistry just because. I never took it in high school and certainly didn't need it to become an elementary school teacher. But I wanted to understand it. So I took it in college - and got an A. I learned how to fly a plane when Greg belonged to a flying club. I've learned karate and how to ride horses.
Some dreams though, fall by the wayside for one reason or another. I always wanted to learn to play the piano, but never did in all the years we had my sister's piano here at our house. It's one of the few regrets I have but I was busy with grad school and simply put my time elsewhere. I always wanted to take swim lessons and learn how to swim well; conquer my fear of deep water. With two chest/shoulder surgeries, that just won't happen. Neither will learning to play the bagpipes. And I will probably hang up my dream of learning how to parachute. Saying I wanted to parachute is how I met my husband. He heard me say that the night a group of us went out to a bar and he decided he wanted to get to know me better. But when you've had surgeries as extensive as these, you know better than to put yourself in a position where you could ever be in that much pain again. And parachuting, like motorcycles, carries too much risk for my comfort. It's sad when you let your dreams go, whatever the reason. You realize you're mortal...that you're growing older...that you've got limited funds...or time...or.....
There is one entry in that journal, entered Feb 1982 - 30 years ago - that says "publish some of my writing". Through my involvement with La Leche League, I became an editor for their Leader magazine Leaven which is read by their leader volunteers all over the world. On occasion, I wrote articles for them that were published in that journal. So I can say I've accomplished that goal. But I am revising it. I want to devote enough time to my writing that I can submit a manuscript to a publisher and have a book published. That's my dream now.
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